Lucifer and the Biscuit Hammer

Alt title: Hoshi no Samidare

TV (24 eps)
2.764 out of 5 from 811 votes
Rank #15,998

Yuuhi Amamiya is a loner whose mistrust of people was instilled in him at a young age by his abusive grandfather. So when an annoying talking lizard tells the university student that he is one of twelve knights chosen to stop the gigantic "biscuit hammer" before it smashes the Earth to smithereens, Yuuhi has no inclination to rescue such an unkind world. Despite his apathy, the boy is targeted by a golem while going about his day-to-day life, and ends up teaming up with the other knights anyway. One of his new companions is Samidare Asahina, the "princess" and leader of the knights, who secretly is only trying to protect the Earth so she can destroy it herself! Entranced, Yuuhi swears eternal loyalty to this cheerful devil that promises to crush the world he despises.

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This anime was amazing. I don't know how they did it, but they messed up in every possible way they could. The visuals/animation were bad, the sound/voice acting was bad (despite it being full of talented VAs), the story was horrendous, the characters were mostly unlikable and one note, the pacing was all over the place, hell even the action was terrible. There is absolutely nothing good about this anime and I'm actually impressed. I heard the manga was good, but I'm not even sure I believe that anymore, unless they took absolutely nothing from the manga when making this anime. In all fairness, there are plenty of examples where a good manga was turned into a steaming pile of feces. Now I'll name some amazing (bad) parts that I found particularly amusing: SPOILER WARNING (Although you shouldn't really care about spoilers for this anime) Every time a character died, that very same episode had a flashback memory dedicated to them, thus making the death extremely obvious, resulting in absolutely no impact of the death itself. I felt absolutely nothing for any of the dead characters, who were barely in a few episodes only to then had a very cheesy death forced on them, it was almost comical. Also on a kind of related note, I loved how the dog man was flirting with the big sister for a few days, which apparently made her fall in love with him so hard, that she was bawling her eyes out upon learning of his death, as if a family member had died. Lizard man pretty much inherited the dead people's power, rather than working for it and even then, he was a total pushover the whole anime, unable of beating a single relevant enemy, up until the penultimate episode where he suddenly became so strong that multiple knights couldn't even scratch him. He says he was holding back, but if that's true then all the people who died while he was being useless are on him, not to mention he acted very emotionally to those deaths. Main girl was very sick when she was a kid, terminally in fact. Then a magic space goddess appeared in front of her demonstrating her limitless power and offering her a wish, ANY wish, even telling her that she can easily cure her fatal illness. "Nah fam, I'm good, instead let me wish something utterly useless and mundane instead." *few years later* "ITS NOT FAIR THAT I DIE! EVERYONE DIE! If I can't live then no one should, so I'll just destroy the world!" Very nice protagonist we've got there. Surely there will be consequences for her actio- Everyone forgives her and welcome her back with open arms, then she lives happily ever after, even curing her illness. Alrighty then... But the most amazing part was the very end. I don't know how they did it, but they were able to ruin the show even further in the epilogue. I know, I also didn't think it was possible, but the show kept getting worse to the very last second. Every single named character in the show, ended up with another named character in the show. The little girl who had a crush on the 30+ year old dude? Yep they're lovers. The little boy and the other little girl, who practically never said a word to each other? Yep they're lovers. The snake lady who was heads over heels in love with lizzard man and the phat cat dude who never showed even the slightest hint of interest in the girl? They are married of course! "B-but its been 10 years! Anything can happen in 10 years!" Yes, that is literally what the show used as an excuse... Fantastic writing, if you're 12. Speaking of cringe teenagers, I won't even mention the big bad or his backstory cause that was some of the most chuuni, cartoonish stuff I've seen in a long while. END OF SPOILERS Overall this anime was a monument of horrible writing, visuals, and... well everything really. I for one am happy that I've seen the worst anime I'll see for at least a few years. I proudly give Hoshi no Samidare a well deserved and very enthusiastic 1/10.


3S Review no. 65 (short, simple and salty/sweet/spicy) Damn, this is show is definitely one of the shows of all time. It is such a weird contraption, it had so much potential, so many great ideas, yet so many apparent flaws. So, the story starts, and you think wow, that is great, there is giant biscuit hammer! that is gonna destroy earth, then you meet the protagonists who are supposedly chosen to fight against it, yet they are like nah, the earth is a shitty place anyway, it’s not the hammer that will destroy it, we will destroy it first, is that fuckin metal or what. Yet, the show never has the feeling that it should, the world is just casually keep living while the protagonists fight off monsters like they are power rangers. The premise sets a feeling, an atmosphere that the show doesn’t live up at no point in the show. It could have been, but it isn’t. Then we get to meet the… antagonist I suppose and still we don’t have a clue about why is everything happening, what are the motives etc. The pace is not great either, some stuff that should happen faster take too long, but mostly some stuff that should be explored better feel awfully rushed. While the events that take place, the story lets say is not bad, story telling is definitely problematic. I can’t tell if its mature story that is told by child, or a childish story that is told by an adult, either way it did not succeed, the idea was there, it could have been good but it definitely isn’t. There are a lot of characters introduced as the story continues, most of them had potential once again, their relationships, their pasts, their pain, death and happiness, there are interesting stuff, yet everything happens so haphazardly, that in the end it falls flat, everything needed a lot more time to work, what the characters do, how they act, it is fine on paper, yet there is no build up, there is no breathing room for the characters, so they just feel like they are simply dancing on the plot rhythm, even if they are more than that. Once again, there was potential here, but it didn’t quite work out. So, like it wasn’t enough that the events and the characters are presented in a problematic haphazard manner, there goes the animation to make everything even worse, and we unlike the storytelling the animation isn’t simply problematic, it is god awful, it is terrible, it is unsalvageable, it is eye insulting, every single aspect of it. Sound is fine, voice acting is probably the most solid part of the show. So, is it worth a watch? Well, it could have been, but unfortunately it isn’t. It had potential definitely, has some virtues, but overall the very problematic pace, haphazard storytelling and god awful animation could never let me recommend it.

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