SECRET SANTA REVIEW 2014
STORY:
The story follows Fujishima Narumi, a normal 16 year old boy, who is new in town and doesn't have any friends. He manages to befriend a female classmate, and thanks to her, he meets a lot of other people. One of them is Alice, the other main character, a tsundere hikkikomori and a self-proclaimed detective. She takes him as her assistant, and they solve cases together.
As interesting as it sounds, the result is actually pretty boring. It's all talk and no action. The cases usually do look interesting at first, but their solution is almost always predictable and unexciting. Apart from the very few moments given to the actual detective work, the episodes are filled with simple character interactions and, of course, fanservice. There are a loooot of suggestive shots of girls, and in every episode is at least one semi-naked one (in her underwear or wrapped in a towel). The first one appears not even 3 minutes in. There are also many scenes with the girls groping each other, taking baths together or undressing each other. And, of course, it wouldn't be complete without Narumi "accidently" walking in on them. All in all, there really isn't much to talk about. You don't need your brain for this one.
ANIMATION:
The animation is pleasant and colorful, though it's nothing out of the ordinary. It's not all that detailed or realistic for that matter, but it's nice to look at. And as far as I could tell, there weren't any blurry or deformed shots. The only (hilarious) mistake I noticed was that the girls' chests kept changing sizes. And speaking of characters, moe is typical for it's lack of diversity when it comes to character design, especially with female characters. Apart from their hair and the colour of their eyes, all girls look exactly the same, no matter if they're high school students or adults. Small stature, long legs, big eyes - all doll-like and as cute as possible. But I suppose it could have been much worse.
SOUND:
Like in all anime, even here the dubbing is of high quality. I was pleasantly surprised with the involvement of Ono Daisuke and Sakurai Takahiro, my two favourite seiyuus. Both the opening and ending songs fit well with the image of the anime, but they aren't that great on their own. The soundtrack doesn't stand out; you don't even notice there's any music at all.
CHARACTERS:
Narumi doesn't have any special characteristics at all. He's like a background character, who was suddenly promoted to be the hero. His personality is completely flat. It really feels like he's there only to make Alice look smarter and more interesting. She herself is a seemingly super-smart person, but all she ever does is talk about what a unique snowflake she is, cry, talk about being a detective, boss people around and talk about how much better she is than everyone else. Her only actual skill is finding everything out on the internet. Then she miraculously appears at the end of the episode and saves the day with her judgment. Seriously, even Narumi does more than her. But yes, she is the most interesting character in the show, because just like Narumi, even the secondary characters are paper thin. Each one usually has just one character trait, like being a flirt or having short temper.
OVERALL:
Challenge completed. And I'm glad it was so short. Seriously, Santa. To quote Calculon: "That was so terrible I think you gave me cancer." Anyway ... If you want more than just cute girls being cute - if you want an actual story or at least likable, solid characters with some development - don't watch this. You'll be wasting your time.
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