Battle Royal High School

Alt title: Shin Majinden Battle Royal High School

OVA (1 ep x 60 min)
2.969 out of 5 from 620 votes
Rank #12,804

Hyoudo is a ‘typical' high school boy who carries out his martial arts battles wearing a jaguar mask. However, there's more to Hyoudo than meets the eye - he's also the counterpart to a Demon Master named Byoudo from the dark realm, and soon comes to be possessed by the evil force! As if that isn't strange enough, there's also an evil Fairy Master whose goal is to spread her nests of bloodthirsty offspring, a pair of space time continuum enforcers, a sword-slinging demon hunter and tentacle monsters galore. Will the Demon Master Byoudo or Fairy Master succeed in taking over Earth, or can they be stopped?

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StoryWhat do space detectives, burly men in jaguar masks, demons from another world, man-eating fairies and tentacles have to do with each other? That's right - ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. It should come as no surprise, then, that the farce known as Battle Royal High School is as ridiculous as ridiculous can get, comprised of a mishmash of genres and styles so varied that its creators were clearly playing a game of drunken Mad Libs while in the drawing board phase. The first 10ish or so minutes, I kid you not, play out something like this: 1. Guy in jaguar mask fights other guys not in jaguar masks. 2. Long panning shot up sinister staircase ends with a pause on a few scary-looking monster types; cue droll, boring dialogue about an oh-so-unique prophecy involving said jaguar guy. 3. Suddenly on a spaceship, in space (what?!); two people intently watch futuristic display screens, and discuss a space time anomaly coming from the school. If you're either facepalming or slamming your head into your desk to make it stop, you aren't alone. Absolutely nothing makes sense about Battle Royal High School once the ‘plot' kicks in, leaving you with little to do but laugh at how outrageously random it is. Don't get me wrong though, Battle Royal High School isn't a Psychic Wars or Black Lion - it's not so bad it's funny, it's just bad. At times it edges closely towards the borderline of genuinely comedic, but falls just a little short of its goal. However, I know something that would help make Battle Royal High School a treat to watch: alcohol.AnimationFor being made in 1987, Battle Royal High School's animation is decent enough. Fight scenes are well-animated, there's a good level of detail and ample gore throughout, and the fairies do look creepily-evil. But seriously, what's up with the horrific character designs? Hyoudo and Byoudo have such pronounced facial features and intense eyes that they are a dead ringer for Sam the Eagle.SoundI remember absolutely nothing about the music. I can only attribute this to having facepalmed so many times that my eardrums were jostled out of place, destroying my ability to hear. However, I do remember the English dub, which was outstandingly atrocious.CharactersIf the characters score was based on the less is more principle (i.e., four people but only two bodies!) or quantity over quality, Battle Royal High School would earn a hefty 50/10. In addition to showcasing far too many random characters, they all tend to look the same, causing yet more confusion. None of them are interesting, except in a ‘wow, I'm glad I'm not THAT guy' sort of way. Take Hyoudo - he's clearly not the sharpest tool in the shed. He fights in a jaguar mask simply because he found it in his house and likes it. He's distracted by shiny objects at the drop of a hat, even when Serious Danger is happening (by ‘shiny object' I mean a hefty pair of breasts). And above all else, he's a man's man who dominates his enemy: intelligence. +2 for the little fairies as they at least were awesome; -2 however for the Main Fairy, who was just as fail as the other characters.OverallThere's little to no reason to watch Battle Royal High School, though given a ton of people tend to mark things ‘want to watch' after I write a ranty review, there's probably not much I can do to stop you! With an absurd plot, too many characters and a smattering of genres that feel forced together, the OVA's only benefit is the fight sequences and random gore. If you've consumed a copious amount of alcohol and feel like a good laugh, try on Battle Royal High School for size. Otherwise, do yourself a favor and eat a ham sandwich instead.


Story: The story is retarded. Wait, wait wait wait, that came out wrong. Let me start over again. Story: The story is fucking retarded. That's better. As to why it's fucking retardifucks instead of mere retardation of whatever the fuck is going on, well, that's easy! Everything about it! From the school life of King, a guy who likes to wear a Jaguar mask for shits and giggles who can kick the asses of all the punk bitches in his former Karate club, including the 7 foot tall gorilla captain; to the Space Time Continuum Police Force stopping a demonic demon lord of darkness from conqueroring the world due to a rip in the fabric of the space time continuum; to magical evil titty faeries who possess people and make them do evil things; to lightsaber Iron Man fights; to I have no fucking idea how the demon lords or the future space police have to do with one another or that one guy with the long hair and the wooden sword or why the fuck Earth is home to a rip in the fabric of yadda yadda.  This fucked up fantasy/sci-fi/comedy/school life/horror/mindfuck/action/supernatural/???/thriller/ecchi/shit randomly blowing up makes no fucking sense when you slap it all together. I will give it credit for being hilariously fucked up and completely ball exploding awesome when it really kicks into gear, aside from the opening manly karate fight of jump kicks and face punches and shit. In fights, faces explode, demonic things explode, bitches get cut, energy beams from weapons get thrown around while shit starts to randomly blow up from the sheer testosterone and how half of this comes into play in terms of story or even 4/5 is beyond me. But it's awesome, and I didn't even touch on all the demonic monsters! Penis monsters, tentacle monsters, monster monsters, monsters who tear the clothes off girls, and titty faerie monsters. Most of them either blow up or explode into blood. I actually don't even know what to rate the plot because I barely know how to explain it properly. It stopped making sense before the final confrontation and possibly well before that and that's not even including the completely random as fuck ending that just happened just because. Animation: Well! This was quite a surprise. The eyes I particularly liked, well animated and any guy who was important was buffed and/or good looking, the girls were pretty fine, the Demonic Fairy Queen of Demonic Darkness was quite a looker, there was a Jaguar mask and the other monsters were as ugly as sin. Quite well done for a 80s OVA and it was fun to look at. Slips a few times but I really did like the style despite how outdated it may be. Sound: The dub was shit but funny in how some of the VA phoned it in and didn't give a rat's ass. That's 80s English dubs for ya, and I wouldn't change it. The OST had some good moments, the credits especially and some of the latter fights but could have used more big, rad guitars and more guitar solos, emphasizing the massive amounts of ass kicking being dealt. Good overall but room for improvment. Characters: You have got to be fucking kidding. I mistook a guy for the main guy who was actually some random schmuck because no one would fucking die like that before copping a feel. None of them had names I could remember and while they did some real important shit (By "important shit" I mean "kick shitloads of ass and getting into badass fights" kind of shit), they're as deep as a mostly empty bottle of grape soda. I don't know how to explain it any more than that. Overall: This was stupid, confusing, nonsensical random ass shit and it represents bad 80s OVA properly., So bad it's good and packed with action and violent carnage. The plot is pointless, the characters are shallow, things explode for no reason, fights are had and things get butchered while people take over bodies and shit. I had fun with this, despite it's brain crippilingly flaws and a terrible English dub demands that it be watched dubbed for the full experience.

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