School Days is a train wreck. Not only is it a train wreck because Makoto, perhaps one of the most despicable and idiotic characters of any anime I’ve ever seen, is wrecking some girls using his train, but also because School Days is so bad you can’t stop watching. As I sat in my chair contemplating who wrote this pile of cow manure, who created such horrible characters, who created such a disgusting plot yet one of the most memorable anime I’ve ever seen, I nearly had a brain aneurism. Watching this is like watching an episode of Dr. Phil on steroids, it’s just that fucking inappropriate, stupid, bad mannered, and tactless. It’s an unapologetic piece of shit. In fact, it’s twelve pieces of shit, the first being a rabbit turd, the next being a golf ball and the eleventh being a submarine, while the last is about the size of a yacht, but it has a smiley face on it, so after all the pain of getting it out you laugh at it. What I mean is, it starts fine, but gets more and more painful as it goes on.
The plot of School Days is as reprehensible as everything else about it. Makoto is a high school kid who sees a girl on the train every day named Kotonoha who he turns out to like. A girl at school, Sekai, helps get them together. This part is somewhat cute. But then Sekai winds up wanting Makoto and Makoto winds up being all over Sekai and not telling Kotonoha about it. Then she finds out about this side relationship and it just gets more and more ridiculous and complicated as Makoto fucks everything that moves and winds up banging a bunch of friends who are trying to help Makoto get with Sekai (because that’s the best way to tell someone to stop dating someone else and get together with another girl). It’s just pure stupidity. A never ending cavalcade of idiocy that runs on and on and won’t stop and just keeps going and going. There’s just so much sex happening to this guy and so many ridiculous situations. One of the stupidest is this bed at school during the cultural festival where lovers get together and shag. First of all, eww, how many fucking people have used that same bed to have sex on? It may have been a mattress at first, but now it’s a fucking waterbed. Secondly, the sheer amount of tissues in the trash can was amazing, someone should take out the trash. Third, why hasn’t a teacher figured out there is a fuck bed in the school? I mean, these are questions I had for a small portion of the show. I was asking questions all the way through. One of my favorite, and the most endearing I’m sure, is why the hell Makoto has so many chicks who like him?! I know this goes more so under the character section than here, but I can’t bring up the story without complaining about the complete idiocy that is the mess of a cast! Makoto is the worst, and I can’t believe there is actually a fucking character like him! Why do girls like him?
And I better bring up the ending. The ending is like the sprinkles on top of a shit-cream sundae. It’s like climbing the peaks of Mount Phallus, and reaching the top to find the Golden Turd of Xerxes. The ending didn’t exactly blow me away and I don’t see why it’s so controversial. I mean, it was dark. It went a completely different direction. I laughed harder at it than I’ve laughed at anything in ages. Let me give a little spoiler warning before I go into the ending:
The “pregnant” Sekai watching on as Kotonoha and Makoto tongue wrestle was freaking hilarious. It was so bad I wanted to cut myself, but I was too busy laughing to grab a razor. After that, the stabbing scene, what should have been a dramatic part, made me pump my fist violently while screaming “Stab him more!”. After that, the death of Sekai was just plain good. I mean, I was so happy to see the two worst characters get violently murdered. It made me feel good. The very end is something that people seem to dislike, but I found to be the best part of the entire show. Congratulations, Kotonoha is a fucking psychopath who will forever live with Makoto’s decapitated head in her breasts. Oh yeah, it was morbid, but it was still so satisfying. I felt good. I felt invigorated. At the end I sat there with a look of awe on my face as I pondered where the ending came from. And then I watched the extra four endings that they had to make. All four were pretty bad, though Kotonoha’s suicide off a building was freaking sweet. I had to replay her head smashing against the ground twelve times just because it was that good.
Overall, the story was bad. The ending, as I’m sure you know if you have heard about this anime, makes up for it ten-fold with a total freaking idiotic, crazy, and actually heartwarming climax.
The animation? Eh, it’s mediocre. Characters are stoic, backgrounds are meh. The characters designs reminded me of Clannad for some reason. Sekai looked like Nagisa’s slutty sister or something.
The sound wasn’t great either. Voice actors were decent I guess, but the sheer range of emotions must have been hard to deal with since characters seemed to be bipolar to the extreme. The opening was meh, the ending was meh, the music during was meh. I especially hated the song at the end of the eleventh episode about love being tough. Don’t sing something like that about a guy banging five different people. Nobody gets into that kind of situation. Love may be tough, but using School Days as an example of how hard love is is like using Naruto as an example of a good anime. You just don’t.
Now we enter the character section, my favorite section.
Let’s talk about Makoto and what a total prick he is. He is so bad. He is such an awful character. He started off okay, but then we learn about the fact he can’t control grabbing his girlfriend and he becomes this sort of rapist figure in my eyes. Kotonoha is pretty scared of his sudden advances and he doesn’t seem to understand that. To me he seems to think all a relationship is is sex, and this is especially prevalent later on when he’s fucking Sekai like nobody’s business. And then he fucks Otome. Then he fucks that one girl . Then that other one. All while having a relationship with two girls quite intimately. He’s a disgusting character. There is nothing good about him. I wanted to reach through the screen and tear his eyes out. He’s a horrible excuse for a boyfriend, a horrible excuse for a person, and I don’t understand why girls actually like him.
Kotonoha started off really sweet and I liked her, but when she finds out about Makoto cheating on her she doesn’t do anything but deny it. It just doesn’t seem that realistic to me. Would a girl really deny it when she sees her boyfriend tongue wrestling someone else? That’s the point when the knife meets the balls. But instead, she just goes with it and becomes kind of crazy. Which is fun to watch.She is the only character worth caring a tiny bit about. I didn’t much like how fast she developed in letting Makoto fondle her and play with her like a toy, but that’s about my only complaint.
Sekai is a total whore. I hate her almost as much as I hate Makoto. She’s just disgusting. She’s a terrible human being. She does all of these things to get Kotonoha and Makoto together, then decides that she’ll just start fucking the guy during that relationship and call it “practice”. And instead of telling Kotonoha about this relationship, they instead let the poor girl think she’s still dating Makoto. And to top it all off, Sekai's a liar and selfish. She’s a horrible person. She’s a whoreable person!
Other characters....Hikari is a whore and a bad friend. Nanami shouldn’t be ashamed of giving BJ’s, Otome is pretty pointless and dull, Setsuna was my favorite character until she showed her true face as a whore. There you go, I can sum up every female character in the show but Kotonoha as a whore.
I like to think that School Days isn’t taking itself seriously. But that’s just wishful thinking on my part. I have this strange feeling that it was taking itself seriously and the ending was supposed to be sad. I don’t get it. I don’t understand it. I don’t know why anybody would say that this is good. It’s not. It’s bad. It’s horrible. It’s like something Satan made. The romance is unbelievable, the characters are unbelievable, the plot is unbelievable. The whole thing is just a mess, a giant shit smear on your television screen. I can’t recommend it, yet I want to recommend it! This is the epitome of so bad it’s good, it’s the epitome of terrible romance stories, it’s the epitome of bad writing. It’s like I’ve reached shit Nirvana! It’s an anime that will stay with you for a long time purely because of how bad it is. It’s twelve horrible episodes. It’s twelve undeservedly well-watched episodes that carry a fan base. It’s the kind of show you watch just because you want to tell your friends you sat through it. It’s the kind of show you watch because you are a masochist. As you watch, you remember all of your past relationships and you think “Wow, I’m glad the writers of this show never had a relationship and could write something as hideously awful as this”. Push yourself through it and be rewarded with an ending straight from the God’s themselves.
Watching this is like getting a scar. It hurts at first, but when it goes away, it just leaves you with funny memories about how you got it. After watching this, I can safely say that my life is complete and I will never believe any woman who tells me she’s pregnant with my baby.
That’s the lesson, right?
I’m giving this shit a 3/10.