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Cetonis

about me

Not a whole lot of general stuff to say really, I'm a web developer finally working at a real place after a few years of small business grunt work. Also pursuing a master's in math at WCSU.

Anime-wise, I tend to like the vast majority of what I watch, though I do steer clear of shows that are excessively ecchi, kiddy, or too far shoujo to work for me. My favorites are generally slower paced slice-of-life or mystery series, (particularly those with an intellectual side) as well as some dramas.

Aside from anime I (try to) do some console RPGs when I have the time, and play competitively in a small but awesome CCG called Universal Fighting System.

So far as a ratings system goes, I'm really, really bad at sticking with one system for any significant amount of time -.-' So its probably best not to pay them too much heed.

I'm also a moderator on the anime sections of the forums, and like to run various things there - the Anime Cultist Club, Annual Anime Awards, and other random contest-things.

my life spent on anime

  • 5 Minutes
  • 15 Hours
  • 6 Days
  • 3 Weeks
  • 3 Months
  • 0 Years

My Signature

Cetonis's signature

Location:

Hyde Park, NY

Member Since:

July 6, 2006

Last Visited:

March 24, 2014

User Stats:

27 / Male

117 recommendations

Anime Ratings

  • 5
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  • 3.5
  • 3
  • 2.5
  • 2
  • 1.5
  • 1
  • 0.5

total anime ratings: 416

Favorite Genres

Least Favorite Genres

Manga Ratings

  • 5
  • 4.5
  • 4
  • 3.5
  • 3
  • 2.5
  • 2
  • 1.5
  • 1
  • 0.5

total manga ratings: 0

comments

Sandbar avatar Sandbar

Konnichiwa!

Jan 28, 2009

29th January, 2009. 9:30am.

Sandbar bolts upright from his restless night's sleep and simultaneously notices two things; the first was his erection and the second being the word "Cetonis" resonating throughout his mind. Almost immediately following that was the realisation that he was late for his appointment.

"Dammit!", he exclaims in frustration, and grabs his Stalker's Manual for a quick cram session. "Cameronanimeangel......cassiesheepgirl....." - he pauses briefly, chuckling to himself as he reminisces about the time with VivisQueen and the sheep - "...ah...memories. Here we are, Cetonis....majoring in IT, likes console rpgs, loves Magic the Gathering card game, gender assumed to be male, but no medical evidence to support this theory".

After a momentary glance at the case file, Sandbar races out the door, putting on his stalker outfit (which is totally nothing at all), and heads towards his next target. Cetonis. Good....the erection was still there....

*ding dong*

"Hello?", responds a plaintive voice through the door, "I've had enough of you people. You scare me. Go away!!!". Sounds like the previous stalkers had done a thorough job. Dammit, this one is going to be tough.....

"Are you talking about the stalkers?", Sandbar adlibs desperately, "I can't possibly be a stalker, since the date of your stalk was slated for the 28th, and it's now the 29th. If you can't trust a naked man with an erection, who can you trust?"

Silence. Ten seconds. Twenty. Then the door slowly opens and a pale faced man appears, looking bedraggled and quite the worse for wear. His face is a picture of paranoia and mistrust, and as he squints past the shaft of light illuminating his blood-shot eyes, he takes note of the naked man in front of him.

"Hi there! Cetonis, is it?", Sandbar chirps cheerfully, "My name is Sandy, and I'm here from the Magic the Gathering Commitee of....umm....the World, to inform you that you have been selected to receive this rare Magic playing card, worth an estimated five million dollars. It does 200 points damage, can't be blocked, flies, acts as a wall, annihilates all of the opponents creature cards, and also lets you date Jessica Alba."

Cetonis eyes widen with excitement, and beckons Sandbar inside - but then all at once his eyes narrow and he frowns at the naked erect man suspiciously. "You're completely naked!! And I don't see any card!!!"

Sandbar moves in on Cetonis with a grin. "I know. The challenge is, you have to find it.".

The door closes behind them, and Cetonis can be heard screaming from several blocks away. It was a good day. A good day for a stalk.

 

therik avatar therik

Konnichiwa!

Jan 28, 2009

"Do you ever find it strange" the child piped up "that Cetonis is an angaram of notices, but you haven't noticed me stalking you yet?"

Cetonis turned around surprised. Behind him stood a girl, no older than five. The infant was chewing on a finger. The finger was not hers.

"Have you lost your mummy?" Asked Cetonis.

"I don't have a mummy."Said the girl. She took the finger she was chewing on and napped it in half at the knuckle before putting the smaller half in her mouth. "I've noticed that you like IT, but not children's anime"

"... what?"

"Well, isn't it funny that you like computers but not cute romps?"

"Not really." Replied Cetonis bluntly, already tired of the child. "So where's your Daddy?"

"No, I don't have a daddy either. Oh, I see you're from Poughkeepsie, NY. Do you have a huge pokey penis?"

"Well, I actually spend a lot of time in Factoryville, PA."

"Then you must like lolis."

"Huh?"

"Well, I figured that living in Factoryville, PA, you'd have a 'very flat' policy."

Cetonis thought about these last two anagrams. "Wonder if she's coming on to me?", he muttered to himself.

"Where are you from?" He asked.

"The Darker Stealth" she replied, honestly. Cetonis thought for a while, but couldn't solve the anagram in his head. He would write it down when he got home. Abruptly, the child piped up again.

"Will you be my daddy ?" asked the girl, who had now finished one half of the finger, and was starting to munch on the remainder. Cetonis snorted dismissively at her and turned his back.

"Go find someone else, kid."

After a brief pause, the girl began to cry, then wail, then scream. Cetonis looked back at her, the once happy face scrunhed up in infantile anguish, and the finger-snack discarded on the floor. He clenched his fist by his side and stared up at the sky. The moon was out. It was getting late.

"Just for tonight." He said. "just for tonight, but then I'm taking you straight to the police station."

The girl's eyes lit up with joy, and Cetonis found it difficult to maintain his frown. Inside he was smiling.

"Come on" he said, "I'll show you the way."

As they walked home, Cetonis didn't see the girl take a mobile phone out of her pocket. Nor did he spot her dialling a number. Nor did he hear her as she whispered into the device.

"Anna to therik: I'm in."

 

~Fin

arc666 avatar arc666

Konnichiwa!

Jan 28, 2009

Oh, my non-existant god ...is your avatar a Tonberry?

..Anyway back to buisness VivisQueen's charged us with a task.

''Who the hell are you?'' Certonis asked the boy.

''Shit, you weren't meant to see me'' He took afew steps back, ''not that it matters now ...I have shamed the rst of the stalkers and as such I must end my life and rid them of a burden'' He ran, fell over, got up, then jump infront of a truck''

''Ooh, nasty'' Certonis thought to herself.

''Dammit it didn't work! Now i'm a ...a ..a ghost? Am I a ghost?''

''Yes, seems so. Go away''

''No ...this could be to my advantage'' He dove into Certonis's body.

''Hey, good morning to all you good folks in Factoryville!'' Certonis's body said but she didn't will it to.

''Great, just great i'm sharing my body with a ghost, an annoying one''

''If you want I could leave...''

''Really?''

''Yeah, just take me to some other poor sap and i'll take it's life ...uh, share it's body'' Certonis decided that for today sleep would be best. Take action later.

''Okay, i'm all done with work, lets find a vic ...vessel'' Certonis had finished all the work he had so his day was free.

''Okay! ...That one''

''....That one? You sure? I mean look at it'' The ghost had chosen a local statue, old and rather broken down.

''Better than taking a live body right?'' Certonis had attracted alot of attention talking to seemingly know one and decided to just let it go. Certonis walked to the statue and he simply glided out into the statue.

The next day it was in the news that lampposts had begun acting up all around the area of that statue.

Two days later, Certonis's general area.

Three days later it had stopped. But Certonis always had the feeling of being watched ...and wherever Certonis went machines always acted up as if posessed....

KatDJZ avatar KatDJZ

Konnichiwa!

Jan 28, 2009

You wake up and get ready for class, feeling like its just another day. Get dressed, breakfast, the usual. As you head off to school you figure you are in for a boring day just like yesterday.

As you walk across campus though, you get the feeling that the other students are looking at you. Not just one or two, but everyone seems be staring, but they quickly avert their eyes when you look their way. What could possibly be going on. You figure maybe your imagination is playing tricks on you.

However, as you pass one of the bulletin boards on campus, something catches your eye. It seems to be a photo. Of you. Thats weird, it seems to have been taken without your knowledge. It is just a picture of you eating dinner one night, but who took it and why is it up there. You take it down, shrug to yourself and go to class.

Class goes fine, but as you walk into the computer lab, all the desktops are set to pictures of you sleeping. Everyone turns to stare as you walk and as they whisper to eachother. Freaked out, you turn and leave. As you run from the building you pass more boards and see that there are pictures of you posted all across campus. Of you sleeping, reading, eating, getting dressed. No wonder everyone was staring. Who did this and how long have they been watching you? There are no clues and you have no idea how you could find out. Nowhere is safe anymore...

 

Sheila avatar Sheila

Konnichiwa!

Jan 28, 2009

You're at home, sitting beside your computer, and you're a little tired.

"Wanna have some tea?" you heard suddenly.

Yeah, that would be great, you  thought. In a few moments, there is a cup of tea on your table.

"I'm I weird? I don't remember bringing a tea in my room... Well, nevermind, the tea is good, and I'm tired, so it's fine, to drink some tea....... What I wanted to do right now? I forgot" you talked to yourself

"You wanted to browse on A-P forum" you heard an unknown voice.

"Oh, thank you." you browsed through forum...

"And you wanted to see where the suspicious people around you comes from"

"Suspicious people?... Eh, I must be really tired, talking to myself like this!.... What's that evil laughter?!"

"It's nothing, you can trust me."

"Great." Then you saw a thread 'Introduce a friend... to be stalked' and you could read 'We're watching you!'

You turned your head around...

Well, did you really expect to see anyone?

 

 

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